M5, Junction 26 · 7:42am · Stationary. Again.

Somerset Jammer
Locations

Live road & traffic alerts. No time machine needed.

Ye see it, ye send it 👀 · Cones counted daily since forever 🟧

4,812,331Cones on the M5 (estimated, still breedin')

9 monthsJ25–J26 barrier works. Long enough to have a babby 👶

0Times anyone's got past Chelston roundabout first go

∞Tractors doin' 12mph on the A38 at tea time 🚜

Report a Jammer

Spotted a queue, a crash, a flood, a rogue sheep or a fresh litter o' cones? Tell us 'ere and it lands straight on Chris's phone. Proper job. 📲

Passengers only, my luvver. Don't touch your phone while you'm drivin' — pull over safe or get whoever's ridin' shotgun to do it.

One ordinary Monday mornin', stuck on the M5 at Junction 26, one man stared into the endless orange abyss o' cones… and regenerated.

Now 'ee can travel through all of time and space.

Still can't get past Chelston roundabout.

Jammer: A queue. Also, anyone who reports one. Ee's a jammer, she's a jammer, we'm all jammers.
Dreckly: When the roadworks will finish. Could be Tuesday. Could be 2031.
The Orange Army: Them lovely folk in hi-vis. Be nice, slow down, wave. They'm only doin' their job.
Gert Big Tractor: Wider than the lane, slower than the queue, and the farmer's not movin' for you.
Rat Run: That "secret" back lane every satnav in Somerset sent 400 cars down at once.
Proper Job: What we say when the road reopens. Rare. Treasured.